Do you fart in bed ?

If this story doesn’t make you cry for laughing so hard, let me know and I’ll pray for you. This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years, the only friction in their marriage was the husband’s habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke the noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.

Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn’t stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor, she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.

The years went by and he continued to rip them out. Then one Christmas day morning, as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts, and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling the bed covers back, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts. Sometime later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bath room.

The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained underpants with a look of horror on his face.

She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, “Honey you were right… all these years you have warned me and I didn’t listen to you.” “What do you mean?” asked his wife. “Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened, but by the grace of god, some Vaseline and two fingers. I think I got most of them back in……………….…..”

Don’t just keep it, share it along on Facebook!

Related Posts

Jokes That Prove Family Life Is the Funniest Roller Coaster Ride

Jokes That Prove Family Life Is the Funniest Roller Coaster Ride

Family life. It’s messy, unpredictable, and sometimes downright ridiculous. But if there’s one thing we can all agree on, it’s that our families give us some of…

Legendary 70s Country Music Icon Passes Away at 73

Legendary 70s Country Music Icon Passes Away at 73

Country music legend Johnny Rodriguez has di.ed at the age of 73, his family confirmed. The Texas-born singer, known for a series of chart-topping hits in the…

A Quiet Video of a Tree Took an Unexpected Turn at 0:18

A Quiet Video of a Tree Took an Unexpected Turn at 0:18

What started as a calm video of a tree swaying in the breeze seemed like just another peaceful nature clip. The person filming had no big plans—just…

Pilot Reacted Emotionally When He Realized

Pilot Reacted Emotionally When He Realized

  Pilot Reacted Emotionally When He Realized A photo of hundreds of birds appearing to fly near a British Airways airplane was virally shared with an inspiring…

Jennifer Aniston Shows 0ff More

Jennifer Aniston Shows 0ff More

We’re diving into Jennifer Aniston’s latest stunning beachside photo. Known for her iconic role as Rachel Green on Friends, Jennifer continues to inspire with her timeless beauty…

THEY FOUND IT! Legendary Treasure of Oak Island Discovered in Smith’s Cove, and Then THIS Happened

THEY FOUND IT! Legendary Treasure of Oak Island Discovered in Smith’s Cove, and Then THIS Happened

In a stunning turn of events that has captivated the world, the legendary treasure of Oak Island, long thought to be a myth, has been discovered in…